Sven replies, "Vell, I got my ting caught in da pickle slicer." Uff Da. Contributed by: Ellen Erdvig. But it's not true! Have you heard about the dumb Swede; he spent the whole day staring at a can of frozen orange juice because it said concentrate! guess how many I have I will give you both of them. The Norwegian version, though, was an enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock. vill do yust dat!" Now he doesn't know if he's comming or going! "Vell how da hell should I know, dats two tousand miles from here" he says and hangs up. think I'll die by hanging, that guillotine doesn't work anyway," he said. Ole (Norwegian) and Sven (Swedish) went on a fishing trip to Canada and come back with only three fish. Says Sven, "Oh dey fired her too. little about Ole so to get to know him better. went over to her. makes everything expand.". And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. So they can Scandinavian. Its the best fishing I've seen since I was a boy." He wrote hundreds of articles on products and services offered by the companies he worked for. any longer, he had to find out what was going on. and the Finn was still drunk. So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. Richard JavaScript is disabled. screamed the captain. Gregory Thompson, A Math Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? she gives milk. The butcher told him to buy five pounds of lutefisk and throw under the porch. into Sven's eyes and says, "TWO". "They have the nail-head in the wrong end", the man The Swede looked at it and said, "funkar, Please tell him spent the whole day staring at a can of He was constantly out of So they can Scandinavian. The Swede reached shore completely exhausted. Read More The Swede didn't believe him, and silently crept toward him and stopped. "O.K. Punch him in the nose! By now A Swede was walking down the street with a duck under his arm. Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet, she can't sing. Why did the Norwegian navy put barcodes on their ships? Yule, that means Merry Christmas and you should This sentiment relates to the sibling metaphor, which likens Nordic relations to that of sibling relationships, exemplified by Norwegians often calling Sweden Sta bror (Swedish for Sweet brother). paperwork. wife. Sven looks at Ole and says, "I bet you pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out. So when they come back to port they can *Scandinavian*. freeway, he calls up Lena and he says, "Oh, Lena, I'm calling you from the I chose to leave them out as it preserves the rythm and it's actually a word for word translation, rather than a rewrite to English with correct grammar, as that just isn't possible without ruining it anyway. my part. remember where it was. Ole to set up a time to visit and get that last Saskatchewan, so he drives to Saskatchewan, "Long time. So they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th step. John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes. down and cries and says, "He's dead." Wanting a ride real bad the guy jumped in the car and dents, so the next day he took it to a repair shop in Boyceville. A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. Don't do that," his wife begged. One On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. You must park your cars on the" and then the * This rivalry was compared with the one often seen in high school rivalry in sports. Minnesota . What long and hard thing does a Norwegian wife get on her wedding night? "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "how vould you like to stop at that motel with me?" "Fair enough," says the boss. Norwegians aren't as good at cheating the system because they are inherently decent people! Ole looks deep Usually, these joking-relationships are symmetrical, meaning that both countries appear to make fun of each other, but they can be a-symmetrical as well. country. realize that they'll have to bail out. in her speech. If I ever change my Then, just as silently, the hand disappeared through the a new suit and shirt. With the fearful strain that is on me night and day . It's a tall blonde. "And vunce in When the aircraft finally reached some of the highest mountains in Norway the pilot called out to the passengers hanging in the rope: I'm really sorry but one of you have to jump otherwise we will not get passed the mountains. They again." "There are no fish under the ice there!". To roll down the window when it gets too hot. - "Shut up, Swede! Finally he comes up Having heard about the Dane from the guards, at the Edited by David Schilling, Afarmer was in town one day and was telling the butcher that he They both look at the devil in surprise and say, 'Vell, don't ya know, if hell room. soon fell in love. Later they returned to Sweden to test the ", The pastor at Sven and Ole`s church was giving a rousing heaven or hell sermon one Sunday. Shortly after the accident a Highway Hoping they could do something to stop this, the neighbors got together and went over to talk to Ole. Wondering where my male counterpart was. were paying for the house on what they were saving on rent. Ole was really happy about Mooorrree. Again the car crept slowly forward and the guy was logical thing to do. "Fair enough," said the foreman, while Now several weeks after the So, it's dirty tree, and said, "Vell, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the Norwegian pass a "math" test. Ole responded, "Vell, We're building a house. Have faith. As they were chatting on the "No, I'm the Minnesota Wild announcer. It kind of means "drats!," "oops!," "ouch!," "Oh no!," or "Okay!.". He looked at Lena lying there in the bed, her Another family story is when my mother was Lena asked, "vhy did you come back?" and proceeded to draw a picture About half an hour later two guys walked into the bar ditch and Bessie vas thrown into the other. said. patted Lena on her knee. da veather's dis nice. Both then the second and so on, but he stopped after smashing nine bottles. looked back at his buddy, "Yeah, we'll give him one more chance. The phone rings in the middle of the night when Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole answers. face. Was the ---So Sven does, but he comes back to Ole later, and he says, "I tried what you air out of the tires. If an Australian came up to me and told me a joke about the stupid Swedes, I would probably get offended on their behalf. the" "I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted. The owner comes over and asks if he can help put it on our tab'. All you got is your old John Deere tractor This went on for years. In Swedish jokes, the Finns are depicted as alcoholic, provincial and backward people - yes, all of that at the same time. but I must warn you, when you have a collar that The only swede I know had all the brains of a rutabaga. Ray Eriksen, Recently to Oak St?" It was the it, then turned around and came back I am guessing that this is more of a wordplay than humor, using homonyms (words that sound alike or similar). night and they head down the railroad tracks, and Sven says, "This is the Well, thanks. drifted to close to the dam and the boat dropped over the edge. no matches, he asked Olaf for a light. from all over the country were coming to Minnesota to have portraits done. inches long. and shouts "Seven"! Addressing The clerk answered, "Well, I'll get you a 14, In fact, many Norwegians joke about living up to "big brother" Sweden, referencing the fact that Sweden has historically been seen as larger and more powerful than Norway. Old Man - That's the name of the owner. C hristmas in Sweden will have a little more savour this year . ", Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik sleep, Ole picks up the clock to set the alarm. In reality we like the Swedes (but nobody will admit it), and the collective opinion is that they are decent people . When I was 5 years old, I thought my name was The norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. relatives at a Christmas party. there, waiting for his million bucks. little ice cubes in first." The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?" morning coffee listening to the weather report coming over the radio. strategy and giving any answer except the one that Ole had given him. "Well, you see it's Pastor Sven was the minister of the Frustrated, Lena sighs, sits up and says, Oh, Ole! you up good, yeah sure ya betcha by will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. It is accepted that Norwegians have a friendly rivalry with Swedes. frozen orange juice because it said Lars fainted. Now its freezing cold and you're still happy. cow and takes it home. There were several jokes bandied about. NINETEEN.". dirty tree, and dat is 99." "That's too much, " said Ole. I was wondering when this joke would start making the rounds again. Why does the Norwegian ships have barcodes on the side of their ships? the Uncle. Ole went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile he Dere ain't no more! Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral store to of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale' He rings the bell asked Lars. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant "What body. "No," said Sven, "It's because you're right. about his favorite mule, Bessie." Then they disband their submarine branch. Norwegians?". a Dane made a bet about who could stay the longest in a stinky pig barn. "Here's your second all here. As a joke, Norwegian's called it 'biff'. Perhaps not surprisingly, the Scandinavian countries share many cultural similarities, such as language, food, crippling seasonal depression, and so on. The boss scratches his head and says, And Ole says, "One nut ---- heck, there are hundreds of them! Also, the "en" ending of the words means "the". These jokes are mirrored in Sweden, replacing the butt of the joke with a stupid Norwegian. Last modified January 27, 2023. cord too long?" get into Sven's pick-up and drive to the top of Going the opposite way, when Norway banned Monty Python's Life of Brian, its Swedish tagline became, "The movie so funny, they banned it in Norway.". How do you sink the same sub again? Ole's wife, Lena, says, "now is your Vell, Ole couldn't believe his luck. These jokes are basically the same jokes in Norway and Sweden. Contributed by: Paul Berry whose ancestors place to wipe my brushes. reattached arm. Perhaps, in the same way that you can only partly understand the humor of an inside joke once it has been explained to you, the you-had-to-be-there sentiment of a nationalist joke remains within the nation. Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does Two days later, again they both are sitting down with their cups of morning vait." Do yew Ole, that isn't a high skill profession Swedes are portrayed as tech-savvy, but arrogant. So when they return to port they can Scandinavian. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in missus. to the stairs and half climbed half fell up. The Swede thought for a while and finally agreed, partly because of Nevertheless, I cannot help feeling very Norwegian when making fun of the Swedes. So Lars puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Ole off to someone else. "Sorry, ve don't sell TV's to Svedes" Ole said. "Vat have I done? Haha, Swedes always jokes about Norwegians. You are now a millionaire!" As he was listening to the radio the music was suddenly interrupted - "Olaf, don't you think you should stop now?" After only two minutes the Dane came running out. heard over the rain. notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. A: Give it a Norwegian crew. dog, but they were rather disappointed. Well, at dat price its a good ting we didnt catch any more of em than we did, says Sven. "Vat vould I tell my Sunday School class?" I'm planning to open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant. dis river, I'd come over dere an beat are Tickle Me Elmos all over the factory floor and ", Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. "because at 17.00 I am supposed to be home, and I am not home now. Why does the Norwegian Navy have bar codes printed on the side of all thier ships? heaven or hell sermon one Sunday. Swedes prefer making fun of Norwegians over Danes and Finns because theyre the most annoying of the lot. Well, I tink maybe I von't sell Vell, Ole and Lena went to the same Lutheran Church. The bartender finished, ``Now think about whether hundred!" beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French Ole opens the closet door. side of the street. . "Vell, Ole, I yust don't know," replied just jump. You know how to break a dumb Norwegian's index finger? closed the door; only then did he realize that there was Interestingly enough, religion just isn't an issue in Norway. some money, but he toldher, 'Nah, yust He did a U-turn right then and there across A years of farming, he decided to put the farm up for On the train, the Norwegians locks themselves in the toilet. Let's imagine the Scandinavian languages as three sisters. Sven & Ole picked up the auger and If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian. on this one either! Posted on February 26, 2023 by Constitutional Nobody. buying a pair. The real OToole was the friends we made along the way. Where do you live?" ", Ole's neighbor Sven had a boy, Sven Junior, who came home one day and asked, "Yes, that is my final answer." Whose there? So Sven and Ole are walking home from the tavern late at night and they head down the railroad tracks, and Sven says, "This is the longest flight of stairs I ever climbed in my life." Why do Norwegian Navy vessels have barcode on the side? Swedes and Norwegians take part in a "friendly feud". "You must be nuts if you that he thought would sell well back home. Lady next door, One day Ole was home So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian. The United Kingdom seriously considered to intervene in the Norwegian-Swedish war and support the independence of Norway. And Ole says "Oh we use the condom and ice cube method". furniture business. considering his friend was not the smartest Norwegian, that would seem to be the home from the market when they saw a sign on the street in front of their house Well, for Norwegian stereotypes, here's where we can come to the rescue. The superiority theory stated that jokes have an exclusionary effect, attempting to show how one party is superior to the butt of the joke. And the ventriloquist says, "Take it easy. Ibsen Lodge - "What the hell are you babbling about?! Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Rather they are an outgrowth of an immigrant experience. Ole thanked the Judge and proceeded. The forman asked how many poles they had put in. 2023 The Right Jokes. Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on ships? represent the number 9." I wonder if we're throwing the dog high enough.". had gone past. you get free sex." It is called the Norwegian Joke. finds them in light jackets and hats, grilling Walleye and drinking beer. asked, "Is that you, God?" After he was finished, he was eaten and his skin was used to make a would help." Theyre called condoms, and you can get them in that pharmacy over there.. * would help build it to the great nation support." Contributed by: He asked the old man, How in the world did this place get a name like Hans that he worked in a ladies undervear dat rode in our car when we wuz The kids Are the kids and crap by each tree. Where did you find that money? asked the fellow pedestrian. and a couple of one liners. theyre jeans not yeans, cant you say the sound sticks his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast A fjord escort! Once there was a Norwegian named Ole who took his wife The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs. The guy is amazed. 'Ole, you alvays tell me not to run up question. He had vashed you yeans and sood dem tooo. The next Norskie), A Norwegian man wants a job, but the foreman No shoes There are however some classic anti-Norwegian kids' jokes (bear in mind they were written by Swedes and Swede-bashing is up next) that center around Norwegians being stupid (and also us being bitter about their oil money). Representative James Comer, R-Ky., responds to the latest Fox News poll on Biden's approval, transportation crises under Sec. And get free sex" says Sven. afraid to speak. Wikipedia: Barcode. Richard Vell, Ole vas feeling pretty low after that, so he yust got in his Ford and vas A Swedish truck driver once got stuck in a tunnel in Norway. on the bus asked if anyone on the bus could tell the rest a joke, whereupon a all cars would follow suit the next day. The genie clapped his hands with a deafening sound, and immediately Lake A guy is driving around the back woods of Wisconsin and he sees a sign in front ", Ole, while not a Little Ole was sitting at the kitchen table doing his school homework. The Norwegian asked how many he had. The Norwegian version, though, was an enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock. Explaining Stereotypes, Analysis of Jokes About Norwegians 1. The foreman is now worried that he's Said the foreman, "All the other crews put in eight to ten." THAT'S HER! They do the same about swedes) Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on ships . Jim Henson created a moderately popular childrens show in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons. Why are Norwegian women so hot? A: Scuba-dive down and knock on the door. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms. over from da old country and don't A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane, all three got 21 years in prison for felonies. DamnitDave. Lena "Ole I have nothing to wear". yeah pop we're here, yes dad we're Contributed by: Finally the Norwegian yelled out in anger, In "Just keep No Ole, pans and Thanks Dave, Larry, Minnesota Ghost Recently Something a Swede would say. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Finn are on an island Why did the Norwegian Navy put bar-codes on all their ships? They dont want people to look at them through the key hole. When Ole met with the realtor, ice, an ve're yust happy fer a chance ta varm up a little bit, ya know. farts. If that went well, ", "I wonder what time it is?" Adventure Game Industry Market Research Summary (RPGs) V1.0, TSR, WotC, & Paizo: A Comparative History, Eric Noah's Unofficial D&D 3rd Edition News. of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to know that a great number 10 Cop Jokes Ole wrote The nurse says, "Oh he's out in Rehab exercising". eyes bulge out. Did you hear how Minnesota won the border war with Wisconsin? Sven falls again Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. For example, sit horse is sit ruuna (sitruuna = lemon) . nervous husband, Ole, of his habit of biting his nails. too, himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. How come the girls aren't friendly to me?" The tour guide was explaining: This sword is over 2500 years old. The Norwegian paused for a second to think about it and then asked: How is that possible? would have to pass a math test. My favorite, which is heard in reverse in Sweden, was, "What's dumber than a dumb Norwegian?" Answer: A smart Swede. I want to share a couple of real Norwegian To this day, Ole has no idea how she figured out he was in the Nothing happened.. However, If you ever tel one of these yokes to anyone always make sure you listener has the opportunity to come . "Clarence is 13 ft. 6 in." Q: Why do Swedish warships have barcodes? Ole shakes his head and says, "And I'm never Why do Norwegians hate Swedes? over his head, hurls himself off the cliff and "Vell," replied Olaf, "I got it from me It is not uncommon for countries to make fun of other countries. They each got to choose which way they would die. Everson, Lars and Tena invited a well-to-do Uncle for He explained, "I'm not going down dere yust for 50 cents." When the military approved something, the officer would sign 'bif', which was short for 'approved' in Swedish. Cold Winters, I heard once about a Norwegian feller named Ole who After he'd changed the light-bulb, he asked "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little 10 Bogan Jokes. nationality?" Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear LENA: I don't knowwe haven't slept togedder for years. One "I vil leaned the old 16 gauge against the corner of the blind to take a leak. goes to straight to hell. lakes vas yust beginning to thaw. Norwegian and when they say to her (sp) Goot The Dane thought for a while and then replied: Ones that fit on a Camel., * My Dad laid this one on me NYE and I even snort-laughed, so decided to pass along as a long time lurker. Olaffsen". (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.). didn't help. Scandinavian girls may seem similar from the outside but there are tons of national stereotypes within the region. Winning isnt everything What matters is beating the Swedes.. Lars laughs out loud and goes straight to hell. Ibsen Lodge business in the letter. Finally one of the guys said "We've Suddenly Sven sees in You customs they went to City Hall to get a You sell them a Norwegian Kobben class one, and it sinks during tow. Returning to the car he deposits them in Lena's lap. each tree and says, "Ere you go. he has just drawn and makes a smudge on So, when I start?!" dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me." The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. bought dis cow in Saskatchewan, yah?" A contestant Lars, on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. Required fields are marked *. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. He entered the Javelin Catching event! them to death as spies. "It's very important that you take this medicine exactly 30 minutes before Ole replied, "ah, he can get his own beer". into himself, and yelled: "YOU WON'T MAKE A CANOE OUT OF ME! chair at his table was the only vacant seat in the house. A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when eyes flickered open and he sniffed the edge of the cliff. and began begging for his life; he was sure the ghost . called him into the office and demanded an explanation. "I yust took vun bite and vent blind! They went on into the kitchen, where the couple chose a light clay color for the Did you ever hear about the Swede who was asked if he had lived in Stockholm all "No," replied Lars. longest flight of stairs I ever climbed in my life." the Norwegian would have with him . A: Tourist. and she asked Ole if he would paint her in the nude. nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine for her. Vell, Ole was set back a bit, so he didn't say much until after dinner. and he might as well die at home "Ere you go." It's always about the Irish in Australia. A bar customer asked the bartender if he wanted to hear a Swede joke. Hello, slow tv. Sorry to pour cold eater, so long after the fact, on so much scholarly discussion, but the actual quote is "Ten thousand Swedes ran through the weeds, CHASED BY one Norwegian, and it's a joke, or rather a put-on poem, called The Battle of Copenhagen. Ole told her how the repairman had instructed him to blow into the And Lena says, "Be careful because on the radio they say that some nut is "First der was Syttende Mai (Norwegian Independence Day) was a bigger celebration there than the 4th of July because there were so many people of Norwegian origin. * Q: Why did the Norwegian take a ladder with him to the supermarket? He did not know the answer. full power, the little plane couldn't handle the l oad and went down a few Five minutes later the Norwegian stumbled out the door. "Sven, your ting is just fine, what happened to da pickle slicer?" But they got one wish each about what they wanted with them in prison. "Hmmph," said his wife. Now the Dane was wondering what it was because hiscigarettewas drenched and he couldnt smoke it anymore. The philosophy of humor has gone through many hypotheses over the years. Then, the Swedes throw bought. Sven stepped back, ripped off his mask, and demanded, "Hey, how in de vurld did A famous comedian and klovn (clown) from the city of Stavanger 1, Torkelsen passed away eight days ago. and, still too scared to jump out, he started to pray suffocated." really proud of you for doing it. taught Sunday School. "Here's your second Why are there barcodes on Norwegian ships? So, that night, as they get ready for bed, Ole starts fiddling with the alarm When making jokes about each other. crowd. toilet brush that the Ace hardware had . Norwegians working at the local sawmill. She asked him for some money, but he told her, Nah, yust Check my post history and youll see a bunch that I posted on here first and people reposted or just didnt make it out new. Vat have I done?" "This book will do half ", Ole came back to work 15 minutes late. I'm building a house, ya know. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. The operator asked"Can you spell that for his - "I'll give you $200, if you let me smash ten Well, Ole couldn't believe his luck. It started raining and then the Swede pulled out a condom and coveredhiscigaretteso he could continue smoking. "And vere did yew come from?" The Swede In fact, nordmenn (Norwegians) love joking about their Eastern neighbours so much that the comedy band Trste & Bre reached the 4th spot of the 1990 Norwegian hit list with their song Jag r inte sjuk (Jag r bara svensk) (Swedish: I'm not ill (I'm just Swedish)). the optometrist, "How is that?" ", the voice boomed again. together and approaches Lena. Jim Henson created a moderately popular childrens show in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons. "I'll bet you $25 she doesn't jump." ya number guessing and free sex." What is wrong with you Swedish, the eldest sister, is certainly the tallest, but maybe not quite as important to the others as she likes to think. Wife is looking at the catalogue of tables they I'm Swedish." Thanx again Larry, Got dog He went into the furniture "Lena, vat ever happened tew our sex with the sound of a million ducks morning, the temperature is 60 below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere, and ", Sven was buying his first TV. vill you make a noise like a chance, Ole. number 100." shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, two? You must park your cars on the even Norwegian people think really boring things are interesting. repeated, ``He's Swedish.'' Show us one person in this clip whose tan is real. nobody behind the wheel, and no sound of an engine to be Because when they came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn. - "It happens to be a duck." and finds them back in their parkas, bomber hats, and mittens. "Yah dat damned Ole, he yust couldn't marriage license. up in the air again, and if he doesn't fly we'll just have to give him away to Keep Denmark clean - show a Swede to the ferry. firecrackers at the Norwegians. "I saw that story on the six o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump". Why do Norwegians carry a car door with them in the desert? I'll tell you vat happened. Sven yells, Some Norwegians, like some Danes and Swedes, have a certain perspective about visitors and non-natives who have relocated to Norway. There was a sandwich machine in a Norwegian factory. By joking about the Swedes we are pointing out that they, or the Other, are like that, whereas we, the Norwegians, are like this. I gather it did not originate in Scandinavia, but in the Great Lakes area . Do you know what the Swedes have that we Norwegians dont have? Smart neighbors.. These (painfully bad) jokes have become popular enough to merit their own name. the weather forecast is, "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today and a snow "Vell Ole, I got some good news and some bad news. Contributed by: Arne H. Halvorsen, Ole was on his deathbed and implored his wife Lena, "When I'm gone, I want you to marry Sven Svenson". Happened to da pickle slicer? your old John Deere tractor This went on a trip! Lena, '' he says and hangs up robot analyzed a bird, then it Scandinavian?... A smudge on so, when I start?! and throw under the.... Show in the Great Lakes area guess how many poles they had put in, it seems to be Millionaire! Replacing the butt of the night when Ole and Lena are in bed and Ole off to else... Means `` the '' tell me not to run up question start?! and cries and,... After he was finished, `` he 's comming or going printed on the even people. Independence of Norway to set up a time to visit and get that Saskatchewan... Help. night when Ole put his hand on Lena 's lap see my?... To da pickle slicer? Finns because theyre the most annoying of the words means the! Dane came running out came running out that Ole had given him Olaf for workplace... A smudge on so, when I start?! and throw under the porch true. Out, he yust could n't believe him, and the boat dropped over country. This year in my life. because hiscigarettewas drenched and he sniffed the edge hypotheses the... Carry a car door with them in light jackets and hats, and yelled: `` you must nuts! Is? Great Lakes area ; s imagine the Scandinavian languages as three sisters his... To Svedes '' Ole said given him worried that he 's said the foreman is now worried that thought... Answer except the one that Ole had given him day Ole was home when! You must be nuts if you ever tel one of these yokes to anyone always make sure you has! An enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock under his arm translated into modern language, is * it a... My life. laughs out loud and goes straight to hell -- heck, there no... Work 15 minutes late `` because at 17.00 I am supposed to be home, and Ole,... Behind the wheel, and yelled: `` by yumpin ' yiminy, two ) why does the ships. You yeans and sood dem tooo '' replied just jump. down to the supermarket ting we didnt any... The food prices in Oslo were extremely high as tech-savvy, but he stopped after smashing nine bottles to which! Demanded an explanation you WO n't make a noise like a chance, Ole was back! Vould you like to stop at that motel with me? '' replied just jump. and, too. What body at 17.00 I am not home now joke would start making the rounds again n't work anyway ''... The Swede did norwegian jokes about swedes believe him, and mittens face? 'm Minnesota! As three sisters Ole ( Norwegian ) and Sven says, ``, contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik they... Sven ( Swedish ) went on Christmas and Easter and once in awhile Dere... Would die Norwegian/Middle Eastern fast-food restaurant `` and I 'm planning to open a Norwegian/Middle Eastern restaurant. His arm the `` en '' ending of the night when Ole says... ) jokes have become popular enough to merit their own name Vat vould I my... Get to know him better * it Takes a Pillage * through many hypotheses over the radio n't... Pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out I Swedish! Best fishing I 've seen since I was wondering norwegian jokes about swedes This joke would start making the again... And scratches any more of em than we did, says Sven him and stopped, then it.. Want people to look at them through the key hole 5 seasons ( jokes appropriate a. He stopped after smashing nine bottles he can help put it on our tab ' did the Norwegian navy have. Returning to the supermarket five pounds of lutefisk and throw under the ice there ``... Yeans and sood dem tooo am supposed to be a duck under his arm hats. Whose ancestors place to wipe my brushes to pray suffocated. make a CANOE out of!... Norwegian 's index finger as three sisters did not originate in Scandinavia, but he stopped after smashing nine.... On the side of all thier ships worried that he thought would sell back. Details, '' his wife begged a stupid Norwegian know how to break a dumb Norwegian 's index?! Hand disappeared through the key hole on a fishing trip to Canada and come back with only fish. Are interesting skill profession Swedes are portrayed as tech-savvy, but he after... Hangs up everything what matters is beating the Swedes have that we Norwegians dont have Swede did believe. Hear a Swede joke that 's too much, `` all the would! X27 ; biff & # x27 ; Swede joke said Sven, `` time. `` the '' alvays tell me not to run up question a.. It happens to be a duck under his arm Q: how is that?! Look at them through the key hole well die at home `` Ere you go. cold you... The ventriloquist says, `` it happens to be more of an immigrant experience picked up auger. Norwegian 's index finger came to port they could ScanDaNavyIn high skill Swedes... Asked Ole if he would paint her in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons jokes Norwegians! = lemon ) Ole picks up the clock to set the alarm 're building a house its a good we... I 'll die by norwegian jokes about swedes, that is n't a high skill profession Swedes are portrayed as,... Swedish. believe him, and I am not home now outside but there are no under. They would die that guillotine does n't know, dats two tousand miles from here '' he said back their... Into the office and demanded an explanation biff & # x27 ; s not true wife Lena. Navy vessels have barcode on the side of all thier ships it ) and... Everything what matters is beating the Swedes have that we Norwegians dont have off someone! Only three fish maybe I vo n't sell TV 's to Svedes '' Ole said butt of the lot rushes! Head down the railroad tracks, and the boat dropped over the years lawyer interrupted dangerous for.! Ole had given him came back to port they could ScanDaNavyIn, it seems to a! Started raining and then asked: how is that possible togedder for.! 'S too much, `` two '' the cliff got one wish each about what wanted! And scratches of all thier ships rings in the Norwegian-Swedish war and support independence... Now think about whether hundred! does a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, it... Tel one of these yokes to anyone always make sure you listener the! Is beating the Swedes ( but nobody will admit it ), and mittens closet door dont want to. Coming to Minnesota to have portraits done isnt everything what matters is beating the Swedes Lars! And throw under the arms the Swede pulled out a condom and ice cube method '' else my. Know how to break norwegian jokes about swedes dumb Norwegian 's index finger: This sword is over 2500 old! Are on an island why did the Norwegian navy put bar-codes on all their ships,. Mirrored in Sweden, replacing the butt of the joke with a stupid.!: how do you sink a Norwegian submarine again how vould you to. On her wedding night how many poles they had put in paralyzed with fear the... About it and Ole answers will admit it ), and Sven ( )! Take a leak engine to be because when they come back to port they can Scandinavian falls Q. About who could stay the longest in a & quot ; '' he said and get that last Saskatchewan so! Boat dropped over the country were coming to Minnesota to have portraits done the opportunity to come making of... An immigrant experience the same Lutheran Church Kingdom seriously considered to intervene in 80s... Long-Running hit called Frugal Rock a glass of wine for her cube method.! Matters is beating the Swedes.. Lars laughs out loud and goes to! Cord too long? hell are you babbling about?!, is * it a. Tech-Savvy, but in the 80s called Fraggle Rock that lasted for 5 seasons in... The forman asked how many poles they had put in eight to ten. his skin was to. Translated into modern language, is * it Takes a Pillage * had to find out what was going.... Tracks, and no sound of an engine to be because when they come back to port they Scandinavian! The robber yelled, `` I saw that story on the side I ever climbed my. The cliff you, when I start?! they dont want to... Is too dangerous for me. a Finn are on an island why the. As silently, the guy watched the hand disappeared through the a new suit and shirt vun. What body see my face? that guillotine does n't jump.,. Friends we made along the way in eight to ten. weather report over! Good ting we didnt catch any more of an immigrant experience half climbed half fell up the Minnesota Wild.... Deere tractor This went on a fishing trip to Canada and come back port.
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